|
| |
|
DRIVEN TO ....
Contributed by Ben Whitmarsh
(ESL practice added by Bibi Baxter)
|
|
THE CONTENTS OF THIS PAGE
A gruesome, fast-moving story with an interesting,
descriptive passage - by Ben Whitmarsh aged 17. Ben's target
audience is between 16-25 male or female Ben is from
Bournemouth, Dorset, England. (Minimal changes have been made, but as
this is an ESL website, essential amendments have been made to punctuation
and tenses by Bibi). Three words, in particular, indicate an American
influence: interstate, make-out, semester; however, spellings
are British (Spelling
Differences)
RELATED PAGES
|
|
ADVANCED VOCABULARY PRACTICE |
|
DRIVEN TO ......
A gruesome story by Ben Whitmarsh aged 17
© 2003
Teaching ideas by Bibi Baxter
|
|
PRACTICE: ADJECTIVES
THE MISSING ADJECTIVES
-
Paragraph-1: beaten / breaking
/ crooked / ear-splitting / furious / glorious / heavily / howling /
mellow / overgrown / picturesque / pointless / roaring / rusty /
shimmering / shrill / wild
-
Paragraph-2: toned / scarred /
right / muscular / mental / local / handsome / emergency / distinct /
dilapidated / dangerous
The ......................... moonlight shone through the
......................... trees casting shadows of gnarled fingers on the
......................... grass. The signpost on the
......................... track of the deserted road had been
......................... battered and vandalised by the local kids. Instead
of reading "town centre 5 miles" it now read "make-out
point" and countless number of obscenities. The birds in the clear
night sky were flying high and making ......................... squawking
noises. The ......................... ocean below was in a
......................... temper that savagely beat the old and cracking
cliff, which held the ......................... 1970 Chevrolet like it was a
never-ending burden. A quiet hum of the late night drive quietly broke the
silence of the scene with its ......................... music and boring
......................... talk. The fickle sky sent its furious clouds of
deep purple to intercept the ......................... moonlight, which gave
light to the scene. The storm was at its ......................... point;
its fury was beginning to spill over in the form of rain, which fell in
curtains over the ......................... landscape. The smell of sea salt
and pine trees was quickly over-thrown by the smell of the rain on the
gravel track and fresh mud. The roar and ......................... clap of
thunder overthrew the squawking of the birds and silenced them with
authority. The ocean's rage also built up as it thrashed at the cliff like a
......................... dog. The ......................... wind beat
around the old and creaking trees threatening to snap them in two.
Paragraph 2
In the ......................... car there lay two people; Sam Harrison and
Sara Rosen were fresh out of the end of semester ball. They were both a little
drunk and a little reckless. Sara looked deep into Sam eyes; she smelt the
......................... fragrance of his favourite after-shave. He looked so
smart and formal in his three-piece suit that he had hired from the
......................... shop. She remembered when he asked her to go to the
prom with her, she felt like a million dollars. She had been infatuated with
him for so long, but she had never had the guts to ask him out, but that was
all in this past. All that mattered now was that they were both here.
She fancied him so much; he was amazingly popular, very
......................... and strangely witty. He was perfect in her eyes; his
immaculate hair was lacking a single strand out of place. His face was caring
and accepting, his blue eyes probed deep into your soul making it impossible
to lie to him. His ......................... arms carried her like she weighed
nothing at all although he played various sports his hands were still soft to
touch and feel. His body was ......................... although slender and
wonderful to caress and explore. He was a sports freak and you could always
find him working out in the gym, or on the sports field. She then noticed that
the music she was half listening to had cut out; she suddenly became aware
that the news was now playing. She looked at the digital clock; it read 12:11.
The news shouldn't be on for another 20mins. She listened in, losing all
interest in Sam who was caressing her neck. The news reporter said that this
was an ......................... broadcast, and that a
......................... and psychotic killer had escaped from the
......................... institution on the hill. She carried on to say that
the hook on his ......................... hand and a heavily
......................... face could identify him.
|
|
THE MISSING PHRASES
-
Paragraphs 3 & 4:
-
tuned into the
radio
(to tune into the radio)
-
squealed in protest
(to squeal in protest)
-
on the loose
(often used with 'to be')
-
long and arduous
fight
(often: 'a long and arduous fight)
-
in the middle of nowhere
(often used with 'to be')
-
into
hysterics
(to send someone into hysterics)
-
in a mood
(often used with 'to be'))
-
finally taken their toll
(often preceded by 'having')
-
buttoned up his shirt
(to button up one's shirt/jacket/etc.)
Paragraph 3:
Sara panicked and started to hear the silence around her. Her breaths
became short and shallow. She told Sam to get off her and take her
home. He protested, but she insisted. He huffed and agreed; he
.................................................. again and climbed over the
seats back into the front. Sara could tell that he was .................................................. but she didn't care; she
wanted to get back to the safety of home with her parents. Sam started the
car, which ................................................... The car backed
out of the famous make-out point and started the long trek home. As the car
pulled out onto the interstate, the engine gave up its
................................................... The years of boy racers
and long drives along dusty tracks had
.................................................. on the engine. Sam drove
the dead car into the lay-by with its last ounces of movement. And put the car
into neutral and began trying in vain to get the car to start.
Paragraph 4:
Sara began to panic. They were now stranded
.................................................. with an escaped killer
................................................... She asked Sam to
phone the police but he said that he had left his phone at his house, as he
didn't think he would need it. Sara was starting to get jumpy as every sound
that could be heard outside seemed to be amplified by the fact that a violent
storm was blowing about the car. The trees flung their shadows on to the
ground in the shapes of people. Sara hung onto Sam who held her back. They
were both scared now although Sam didn't want to show it. They
.................................................. again to find the news
broadcast still going on, but it had changed somehow; the news lady,
Victoria Miles, had now begun giving out ways to be safe. She mentioned
staying inside with all the windows shut and doors locked and, if you are out,
then get inside quickly. This news sent Sara
.................................................. who was now thrashing about
inside the car until...
|
|
THE MISSING NOUNS
Paragraph 5:
......................... could be heard on the
roof of the car. Sara and Sam both
became silent. They listened out for any more noises. But all they could hear
was the rain lashing down on the .......................... Sara jumped as she
thought she saw something run across the road in front of the car, but as soon
as it appeared it was gone. She tried telling this to Sam but he wouldn't have
it and dismissed her .......................... Until he saw something run
along the side of the car. He told him self that it was just a wild
......................... nothing more. Until he looked out of the rear
view ......................... and saw a face in the window. He couldn't quite
make it out at first but when he did he wished he had never looked. He opened
his ......................... to scream or shout; he didn't quite know
which. As he did, a glint came from the side of his head. The rain rolling
down the window sent the image of the thing in and out of focus when finally
the whole picture came into focus. The face had deep .........................
down it like he had been cut with a big knife when he was young his eyes were
deep grey that were like 2 deep holes in his .......................... His
head was shaven so that it showed even more scars, bumps and divots that could
only have come from continuous beating. The man was wearing a hospital
.......................... His right arm was held up and on the end of his arm
stood a shiny ........................., which bent round and ended in a barb.
Sam realised that the thing was the escaped psycho.
|
|
MIXED PAST TENSES
(Simple Past: active & passive / Past Continuous /
Past Perfect)
INSTRUCTIONS: Conjugate the verbs
as appropriate
Paragraph 6:
Sara (look)
.................................................... at Sam and (realise)
....................................................that his face (go).................................................... a
pale white and (lose).................................................... all colour. Even his blue eyes
(seem).................................................... to lose their
glint. She (wonder).................................................... what he
(stare).................................................... at and (follow).................................................... his eyes to the back
window, which (be).................................................... empty. She
(ask).................................................... what he (stare).................................................... at; he
(reply).................................................... in a blur that the killer
(be).................................................... outside. Sara (not understand).................................................... what
he (say).................................................... until she (see).................................................... the killer next to the driver's window. She
(scream)....................................................
out loud and (thrash).................................................... about in the car. She
(want).................................................... to be let out of the car.
Her screaming (wake).................................................... Sam out of his trance. He
(try).................................................... to calm her down, he
(tell)....................................................
her that they (be).................................................... safe in the car because he couldn't get in. So they
(be)....................................................
safe as long as they (not go).................................................... out. Sara calmed down. A crack
(appear).................................................... on
the windshield. The killer (scratch).................................................... his way in to the car. The
killer (begin).................................................... to hit the window with his good arm and then take some swipes
with the claw on his arm. The psycho killer (thrash).................................................... about in the howling
wind. Cracks (start).......................... to appear in the windshield. The killer
(get)....................................................
in. All of a sudden the car (fill).................................................... with brilliant light that hurt their
eyes. The killer (dazzle).................................................... and
(run).................................................... for the bushes Sam (look).................................................... over his left
shoulder and a huge juggernaut (loom) in the rear windshield.
|
|
THE MISSING PREPOSITIONS & PARTICLES
across/along/around/at/away/behind/down/for/from/in/into/of/off/on/out/over/to/up/with
Paragraph 7:
Sam was ................ the moon
................ this sight and began ................ get ................
................ the car. Sara hadn't caught ................ and tried
................ stop Sam ................ getting ................ of the car, but he won and jumped
................. He ran ................ ................ the driver's
window and shouted ................ help. The window wound ................ slowly. The face
................ a
55-year-old guy appeared ................ the dark window. His face was as scarred as
the killer's and the flashing lightning cast deep shadows ................ his face.
A twisted smile spread ................ his face making it more ugly. Sam was so happy
and elated that he didn't remember that you should never take a ride with
strangers. He jumped ................ and called Sara ................ follow him and get
................ the truck.
The truck driver remained silent and didn't move, apart from the creeping smile
that crossed his face. Once Sara got ................
................ the truck, it pulled .................
Sam thanked the driver ................ picking them ................, but the driver didn't reply;
all he did was drive ................ his eyes firmly set ................ the road. Sara began
................ worry
and tried ................ get Sam's attention. She was tugging
................ his arm but Sam didn't
respond. So she tugged harder. She looked
................ ................ Sam and released that she
wasn't pulling ................ Sam's arm but someone else's. She pulled the arm as hard as
she could, trying not ................ get noticed. The arm fell
................ the back seat and
landed ................ her lap she screamed and thrashed
................ ................ the cabin. The driver
pulled ................ ................ the side
................ the road and locked the doors. Sara and Sam tried
................ get ................ ................ the cabin
................ vain. The driver told them that the doors were
locked and that they couldn't get ................. He reached
................ the seat and pulled ................ a big axe. It was the sort that lumberjacks use
................ chop ................ trees. The
driver told them that making any noise would be useless, as no one could hear
them, He then threw a mortal blow ................ Sam who bent
................ double and held his
stomach. The driver then slammed the next blow ................ his back. Sam fell
................ ................ the cabin floor. Sara broke
................ a fit of pleading ................ the driver, but her
pleas fell ................ deaf ears. He shuffled ................ the seat and smelt her hair;
he
brought the axe close ................ her head and cut ................ a lock
................ her hair. He then sunk
the axe deep ................ her throat. The driver then piled the bodies
................ the back ................ his truck and drove
................
................ the rising fog.
Story Copyright Ben Whitmarsh 2003
Teaching Ideas Copyright Bibi Baxter 2003 |
|
THE FULL STORY |
|
DRIVEN TO ......
A gruesome story by Ben Whitmarsh aged 17
(from Bournemouth, Dorset, England)
The shimmering moonlight shone through the crooked trees
casting shadows of gnarled fingers on the overgrown grass. The signpost on
the beaten track of the deserted road had been heavily battered and
vandalised by the local kids. Instead of reading "town centre 5
miles" it now read "make out point" and countless number of
obscenities. The birds in the clear night sky were flying high and making
shrill squawking noises. The roaring ocean below was in a furious temper
that savagely beat the old and cracking cliff, which held the rusty 1970
Chevrolet like it was a never-ending burden. A quiet hum of the late night
drive quietly broke the silence of the scene with its mellow music and
boring pointless talk. The fickle sky sent its furious clouds of deep purple
to intercept the glorious moonlight, which gave light to the scene. The
storm was at its breaking point; its fury was beginning to spill over in the
form of rain, which fell in curtains over the picturesque landscape. The
smell of sea salt and pine trees was quickly over-thrown by the smell of the
rain on the gravel track and fresh mud. The roar and ear-splitting clap of
thunder overthrew the squawking of the birds and silenced them with
authority. The ocean's rage also built up as it thrashed at the cliff like a
wild dog. The howling wind beat around the old and creaking trees
threatening to snap them in two.
2
In the dilapidated car there lay two people; Sam Harrison and Sara Rosen
were fresh out of the end of semester ball. They were both a little drunk
and a little reckless. Sara looked deep into Sam eyes; she smelt the
distinct fragrance of his favourite after-shave. He looked so smart and
formal in his three-piece suit that he hired from the local shop. She
remembered when he asked her to go to the prom with her, she felt like a
million dollars. She had been infatuated with him for so long but she had
never had the guts to ask him out, but that was all in this past all that
mattered now was that they were both here. She fancied him so much; he was
amazingly popular, very handsome and strangely witty. He was perfect in her
eyes; his immaculate hair was lacking a single strand out of place. His face
was caring and accepting, his blue eyes probed deep into your soul making it
impossible to lie to him. His muscular arms carried her like she weighed
nothing at all although he played various sports his hands were still soft
to touch and feel. His body was toned although slender, and wonderful to
caress and explore. He was a sports freak and you could always find him
working out in the gym or on the sports field. She then noticed that the
music she was half listening to had cut out, she suddenly became aware that
the news was now playing she looked at the digital clock. It read 12:11 the
news shouldn't be on for another 20mins she listened in, losing all interest
in Sam who was caressing her neck. The news reporter said that this was an
emergency broadcast, and that a dangerous and psychotic killer had escaped
from the mental institution on the hill. She carried on to say that the hook
on his right hand and a heavily scared face could identify him.
3
Sara panicked and started to hear the silence around her.
Her breaths became short and shallow. She told Sam to get off her and take
her home. He protested, but she insisted. He huffed and agreed;
he buttoned up his shirt again and climbed over the seats back into the
front. Sara could tell that he was in a mood but she didn't care; she wanted
to get back to the safety of home with her parents. Sam started the car,
which squealed in protest. The car backed out of the famous make-out point
and started the long trek home. As the car pulled out onto the interstate,
the engine gave up its long and arduous fight. The years of boy racers and
long drives along dusty tracks had finally taken its toll on the engine. Sam
drove the dead car into the lay-by with its last ounces of movement. And put
the car into neutral and began trying in vain to get the car to start.
4
Sara began to panic. They were now stranded in the middle
of nowhere with an escaped killer on the loose. She asked Sam to phone
the police but he said that he had left his phone at his house, as he didn't
think he would need it. Sara was starting to get jumpy as every sound that
could be heard outside seemed to be amplified by the fact that a violent
storm was blowing about the car. The trees flung their shadows on to the
ground in the shapes of people. Sara hung onto Sam who held her back. They
were both scared now although Sam didn't want to show it. They tuned into
the radio again to find the news broadcast still going on, but it had
changed somehow; the news lady, Victoria Miles, had now begun giving
out ways to be safe. She mentioned staying inside with all the windows shut
and doors locked and, if you are out, then get inside quickly. This
news sent Sara into hysterics who was now thrashing about inside the car
until...
5
Tapping could be heard on the roof of the car. Sara and
Sam both became silent. They listened out for any more noises. But all they
could hear was the rain lashing down on the roof. Sara jumped as she thought
she saw something run across the road in front of the car, but as soon as it
appeared it was gone. She tried telling this to Sam but he wouldn't have it
and dismissed her fears. Until he saw something run along the side of the
car. He told him self that it was just a wild animal nothing more.
Until he looked out of the rear view mirror and saw a face in the window. He
couldn't quite make it out at first but when he did he wished he had never
looked. He opened his mouth to scream or shout; he didn't quite now
which. As he did, a glint came from the side of his head. The rain rolling
down the window sent the image of the thing in and out of focus when finally
the whole picture came into focus. The face had deep gashes down it like he
had been cut with a big knife when he was young his eyes were deep grey that
were like 2 deep holes in his skull. His head was shaven so that it showed
even more scars, bumps and divots that could only have come from continuous
beating. The man was wearing a hospital smock. His right arm was held up and
on the end of his arm stood a shiny hook, which bent round and ended in a
barb. Sam realised that the thing was the escaped psycho.
6
Sara looked at Sam and realised that his face had gone a
pale white and had lost all colour. Even his blue eyes seemed to lose their
glint. She wondered what he was staring at and followed his eyes to the back
window, which was empty. She asked what he was staring at; he
replied in a blur that the killer was outside. Sara didn't understand what
he said until she saw the killer next to the driver's window. She screamed
out loud and thrashed about in the car. She wanted to be let out of the car.
Her screaming woke Sam out of his trance. He tried to calm her down, he told
her that they were safe in the car because he couldn't get in. So they were
safe as long as they didn't go out. Sara calmed down. A crack appeared on
the windshield. The killer was scratching his way in to the car. The
killer began to hit the window with his good arm and then take some swipes
with the claw on his arm. The psycho killer thrashed about in the howling
wind. Cracks had started to appear in the windshield. The killer was getting
in. All of a sudden the car was filled with brilliant light that hurt their
eyes. The killer was dazzled and ran for the bushes Sam looked over his left
shoulder and a huge juggernaut was looming in the rear windshield.
7
Sam was over the moon at this sight and began to get out
of the car. Sara hadn't caught on and tried to stop Sam from getting out the
car, but he won and jumped out. He ran up to the driver's window and shouted
for help. The window wound down slowly. The face of a 55-year-old guy
appeared behind the dark window. His face was as scared as the killer's and
the flashing lightning cast deep shadows over his face. A
twisted smile spread across his face making it more ugly. Sam was so happy
and elated that he didn't remember that you should never take a ride with
strangers. He jumped in and called Sara to follow him and get in the truck.
The truck driver remained silent and didn't move apart from the creeping
smile that crossed his face. Once Sara got in to the truck, it pulled away.
Sam thanked the driver for picking them up, but the driver didn't reply;
all he did was drive with his eyes firmly set on the road. Sara began to
worry and tried to get Sam's attention. She was tugging on his arm but Sam
didn't respond. So she tugged harder. She looked over to Sam and released
that she wasn't pulling on Sam's arm but someone else's. She pulled the arm
as hard as she could, trying not to get noticed. The arm fell over the back
seat and landed on her lap she screamed and thrashed around in the cabin.
The driver pulled over to the side of the road and locked the doors. Sara
and Sam tried to get out of the cabin in vain. The driver told them that the
doors were locked and that they couldn't get out. He reached over the seat
and pulled out a big axe. It was the sort that lumberjacks use to chop down
trees. The driver told them that making any noise would be useless, as
no one could hear them, He then threw a mortal blow at Sam who bent up
double and held his stomach. The driver then slammed the next blow into his
back. Sam fell on to the cabin floor. Sara broke into fit of pleading with
the driver, but her pleas fell on deaf ears. He shuffled along the seat and
smelt her hair he brought the axe close to her head and cut off a lock of
her hair. He then sunk the axe deep into her throat. The driver then piled
the bodies into the back of his truck and drove off into the rising fog.
|
|
Copyright Ben Whitmarsh 2003
|
| |
|